A little choked up....

It is late and I'm not sure I can find words to describe this little picture. This is R. Like so many of his pictures - his life seems written in his expressions. Ironically, he doesn't care much for having his picture taken. Tonight, someone (I think it was Marisa) put this picture up as our screensaver on the computer.

It is late and I decided to make one last effort to find a little news about why our file has been stuck, with all of Foyer's files in IBESR. It has been another ridiculous Haiti drama we have been hearing reports about for the last 6 weeks. Anyway, as I turned on the monitor and up came this beautiful picture of R, I got all choked up. I hadn't seen this picture as big as my monitor before. In his eyes, I could barely make out a reflection of me with the camera. In his eyes, I see a little boy with hope and way too many worries. What a beautiful child, patiently waiting for that which his spirit knows is missing. A smart boy. A sensitive boy. A happy boy and a thoughtful boy. I've seen all of these things in this little boys pictures - yes, even the little boy who would rather not have his picture taken.

Every day.....I pray for him. I pray for Marie. I pray for Katiana. I pray they will really find their place as members of our family. I pray that all of us will find our new place. And I look forward to the pictures of the future. Of every one of us!

Catching Up.....

Well, it has been a while since I posted last.....and by the looks of it, I'm about the only one who reads these anyway ;). So, I post to keep a record first and if my friends and family stop in.....I hope they would post a comment back every now and then. So, January 23 seems like a long time ago. Since then, we had the good fortune of going on a cruise to the Caribbean. WOW! We were able to explore the bay at Cinnamon Bay on St. John's, we swam in an amazing gorge/waterfall on the beautiful little island of Dominca, we snorkeled and boogie boarded in Barbados (my back still hurts from the beating I took "trying" to boogie board) On St. Lucia we got car sick on the winding road to a most amazing waterfall and garden that made it worth it! And on the island of Antigua, we went on a catamaran to our snorkel destination and then to a beach where we collected sea glass and shells. It was fast and full of adventure leaving little time to relax..... I would do it again in a heartbeat....but who wouldn't welcome a little Caribbean sun in February? BIG THANKS to Mom and Dad for keeping things in order....and improving the order of things at the Hixon house while we were gone! We came home to find, in one week, Dad had my two youngest setting their own alarm clocks and getting up EARLY each day! However, even DAD would need more than a week to get Marisa and me to wake up earlier :) I'm convinced we both need an alarm clock that mimics Dad banging on the door while saying "Tash, GET UP!....at least that always launched me out of bed during my early morning seminary days!

Miracle of Miracles....

I have the "Miracle of Miracles" song from Fiddler on the Roof stuck in my head today. FOR A REASON! This morning I was feeling very frustrated about the lack of attention our adoption file for KJ seemed to be getting by *anyone* in Haiti. Because we are going out of town and before we know it.....it will be the middle of February - I just couldn't stand the idea of returning home to the same status of our file rotting in the Haitian Civil Court!

SO, I planned to do something about it! Of course, all I CAN do is SCREAM, throw rocks and tantrums and unleash my frustration on everyone around me....but today, my letter was addressed to Mike at Holt International. Here is the letter.....

Mike-
I need, and hope, to hear the attorney working for Holt has accomplished something towards getting our file out of civil court. It is becoming very discouraging. It has almost been a month since the Dec. 27 birth parent meeting that went south. My opinion is, a good attorney would be able to communicate the major blunder on the civil courts part and, tell them that Katiana is turning 13 and has been living as an orphan since she was four and then get her file the H#$% out of that court! (forgive my language) Having grown up with a father as an attorney I have an advantage - still, it is so past anything reasonable for our file to still be held in this court. Please tell me the attorney Holt has hired understands from Holt he should be pushing hard. Pushing hard, to me, would be the attorney making an effort each day to get this turned around. Between you and me, I feel like the adoption files the attorney is working on are not his priority. Just a hunch, but I'm feeling so frustrated that our family and Katiana have to live with daily anxiety about our future and currently the system won't even allow the orphanage directors to advocate for the files in the civil court. So now, Monsour's hands are tied not being able to talk directly with the people in charge at the court. I know you can call me back and tell me that the attorney is working hard - but it doesn't explain the weeks in between with no news and no progress. I need to hear he is doing more than picking up the phone once a week. I'm sure that isn't fair, but when I only hear vague and general details of his efforts it leaves me feeling it isn't his priority. I need to know he has heard from Holt that this file has to get moving and we need him to push hard.

Again, I understand we are dealing with a pretty backwards country with many problems. I still think if the attorney makes it HIS priority he could get our file moving. I also understand the court delayed for 3 months before they decided that they wanted birth parent interviews and the timing of this decision came close to the holidays. We are now approaching February and I just can not even imagine another week going by without any kind of progress.

Again, I think a good attorney would know these details and would present this "case" -pushing to have our file signed out. It shouldn't matter how backwards things are in Haiti - humans understand *reason* and I'm not getting a strong impression that the attorney is using any *reason* to persuade the civil court in signing our file.

I don't know the details of the other files but I hope they would be treated individually with appropriate pressure being used with the court, instead of looking at them as a group of 4 files. If all the files have been stuck as long as ours, than by all means, the attorney should be making the same case for all of us. I hope he isn't letting our file delay because the other 3 files have been in the court for a more "reasonable" timeframe.

Sorry to be so cheerful. :) We are doing all we can to prepare for her homecoming but to have our file SIT for 4 1/2 months, for what should have been a much shorter process, is just hard to deal with.

Thanks for any help you can give towards lighting a fire.

Natasha

p.s. Are we dealing with bribes too? I do wonder sometimes if our file is being held like it is because of that. I would never agree to a bribe and I know Holt wouldn't either. I just need very clear communication about what is going on. Thanks.

oh, and please know - I respect and appreciate you, Holt and Monsour immensely - and my pointed e-mail comes from the frustration that has been building from enduring a Haitian adoption. I'm certain these memories will quickly fade when we finally get Katiana home.

WELL.........I ran a spell check and fixed a couple of words and was about to push send when the PHONE RANG........it was Holt! It was Mike! and he said "How would you like some good news!" Yes! Our file came out of the (not so) Civil Court!!! So, today I experienced a wonderful little miracle and the bigger miracle.....the Lord's timing! It wasn't coincidence that the phone rang at that moment! No it wasn't coincidence at all!
love,
tash

a little news....

Below is an e-mail I received from Crystal who works for Foyer de Sion. She goes to Haiti every 3 months with a group of volunteers and adoptive parents. This is what she had to say about MV and R.

"MV... Ah, what a beauty you have! She is so sweet. She sat by me for part of Sacrament meeting. She tried to get in the van with us after church and we literally had to pry her fingers off the door of the van. :~( Made me sad.....
On the other hand....she was SO thrilled and excited to get your gift! Her face broke into smiles and she just didn't stop. She had trouble opening the bag, so Richard helped her with that. She was happy to see your photos and she seemed SO relieved when I gave her a gift....as though she was judging whether or not she really had a family.... I am SO glad that you sent the gifts!

The scale at the orphanage was broken so we were only able to get heights this time....M was 42.25 inches tall and R was 36.75 inches tall.

R...shy as always...sat on the end of the bench at church, but....he made eye contact and would smile shyly before turning his head away or quickly ducking. And...look at the photos!!! He SMILED!!!! Made my day!!!"


Yes, they are cute and they seem pretty happy. What a strange world we live in! That thought will have to wait for another day......Au Revoir, Bon Nuit!
tash

Happy Pictures...

Foyer de Sion had a parent trip last week which sadly we missed. We did get some new pictures of MV and R with a little update about how they are doing. The pictures speak for themselves. Take a look :)

I will cut and paste the e-mail about them into the next post.
love! tash

We Can Do It! Family

Here we are! This was taken in the "brrrrr--cold" beautiful outdoors of December 2006. We have a wonderful neighbor who came over to snap a few shots for us....and she suggested this photo on the stairs. I love it!

Because she did such a good job, we hope she will continue this tradition in snapping our photo each year *just in time* for Christmas cards. Good neighbors are a blessing -- and we have many!

tash

Another photo.....

This is the latest photo we have of MV and R in Haiti.

MV has decided to smile at the camera since we met her last May.

R on the other hand, is more like his grandpa--he doesn't like the camera *AND* I think he is annoyed that Charlemagne has his hand on his head! I can just hear him now.....quietly whining "ki tem" (translated--go away leave me alone) hee, hee, hee
Bon nuit.....
tash